Home.

First glance.

I never believed in love at first sight. I'm trying to remember that when I'm getting to know my new home. I liked Wroclaw in January when it was grey and freezing and in April when it was rainy and still much colder than I thought. In my thoughts I would have loved green, hot summer Wroclaw, but it has not been that easy. After seeing same shopping center from living room window and after walking those few streets I know it suddenly seemed all so boring. That's it? Is this all? Well of course it's not, Wroclaw is the size of Helsinki, so there must be more. So I guess it's time to come out of the familiar, safe tourist box I've been in and go out there...

We've been going around the city, for employment office and IKEA, desperately trying to find bed linen (how hard can that be?!) so I've got good opportunity to see places outside the market square. Which actually does not look familiar at all anymore, because of the huge EURO fan zone. Anyway while tramming* our way around the city I've slowly but steadily started to get somekind of picture about it, seen new corners and old ones from different angle, learned that it's much bigger than the streets around market place. Don't get me wrong I would still get lost in five minutes (and I did right at the moment I was left alone). And don't even ask about the trams. Or buses. But my point is that I think I will like it here the more I get to know the city. :)

*going by tram, just made it out :P

There's other things in life than just men.

All I need is you...and few suitcases.

23 square meters of clothes, shoes, plates, mugs, furniture and all the other things turned into two suitcases and one bag. And laptop. I have to say I'm quite pleased.

But I think it will take only few weeks to double my belongings again. :P

And of course there is still "some" clothes waiting for winter...

Anxiousness arising.

Four nights and I'm leaving. For the last week or so I've been shit scared something terrible will happen and I will never get there. Or he is not there. Or something. It's horrible feeling, when it creeps in my mind, I cannot really do or think anything else. And the stupidest thing is that the fear will not prevent bad things to happen, it only makes me feel sick to my stomach and ruins my last days here. I guess I have to trust that this will happen, I will get there and he will be there waiting.

I'm having hard time to concentrate on anything: watching tv, reading book, writing this, listening music, running, chatting with friends. Cannot really stay put, but cannot really do anything either. I just want to go. 

I've also been seeing this same dream four times this week. It's the day I'm suppose to go, but I'm still in my own flat here in Finland and all my furnitures and all the other stuff is still there. And I have one hour left before the flight and I realize there's nothing I can do to pack everything and still catch the flight. Then I wake up here, in my parents' home, having only the belongings I'm going to take with me around me. Always such a relief. But to make sure I will not sleep too long and miss the flight, I think I will stay up all night. :D

Apparently I'm slightly nervous.